Life! Death! Top tips!

The chronically misused “funky” here means “looking like you found it under a bus and then dropped a kebab down it”.

There are an amazing 20,000 of you following this blog. I’m going to celebrate by tie-dyeing my pants in marmalade. SO FUNKY.

When Tips Become Self-Aware. This is not just a meta-tip, it also proves the ‘funky’ rule.

There are now an amazing 5000 of you following this blog - thank you for sharing my love of nonsense.

Further proof of rule #2: using the word “funky” guarantees that even the most remedial of tips will be published.

A beautiful painting of a Chinese prisoner-of-war will brighten any garden.

Rule #2: using the word ‘funky’ will mean your tip is featured. Even if, as here, you are flagrantly misusing the word.